Zen - Chanting 'What am I?'
Just a few years ago I wouldn't be caught dead chanting. I'm not a praying man, and seeing chanting to deities I don't know or believe in, that's not me.
Then, some time after participating in a Yong Mang Jong Jin (YMJJ) sesshin at the Providence Zen Center, I found that one of my fondest memories of the Zen Center was the chanting time. I'd often listen to audio recordings of their chanting sessions just so I could remember the pace of each "song" that we chanted.
Calming phrases before evening meditation or sleep
Through most of my life I've used my thoughts to try to calm myself down before going to sleep at night, and before evening meditations. I thought I'd share some of those phrases here today.
In my teens
When I was in my teens and had too much energy, I'd lay in bed at night, unable to fall asleep, so I'd follow this pattern of thoughts:
You don't have to be a wimp
Just a quick note today of something I was reminded about this past week: You don't have to be a wimp when you study Zen.
When I first started practicing Zen and trying to pay attention, I found myself acting very docile ... I was trying very hard to pay attention to everything, and in the process of doing that, I moved very slow, and became very gentle.
The Providence Zen Center residency program
I'm not sure if they'll take me, but I'm very seriously considering the Providence Zen Center residency program. If I understand it correctly, this program will allow me to live at the Zen Center with other students, while still keeping a full-time job in the outside world. I don't know that to be fact, but I think it's correct.
My World War III ended
Back in 2008 I wrote that for me to get back to practicing Zen was akin to starting a personal World War III. It was going to be Little Ego versus Big Ego, and a fight to the death. As recently as December, 2010, I wrote that the battle was still on, and the Little Ego was a tough little bastard.
A few nights ago while watching a Northern Exposure episode titled Things Become Extinct, I realized that WWIII ended at some point, and I never even noticed.
Don't believe anything you can't demonstrate
A long time ago in a Zen book I read a phrase that I really like, and it goes something like this:
"Don't believe anything you can't demonstrate for yourself."
Zen and love
For the second time recently I just found myself talking to a friend about "love", and the relationship of love to Zen.
There's a story about Zen and love where it is said that "normal" love is like holding a coin in your hand, where you place the coin in your hand, and then close your fingers and wrap them around the coin to hold onto it. In Zen you also have a coin and your hand, but you simply hold the coin in the palm of your open hand.
(I'm sorry I don't remember who first said that or wrote it.)
Thinking about not-thinking
Many times when I meditate I engage in a struggle: "Okay, count from 1 to 10 while breathing in and out ... 1, 2, 3, ... oh man, I forgot to do xyz at work ... it's kinda bright in here ... pay the credit card bill tomorrow ... darn neighbor's dog is barking, why don't they let it in? ... Oh, crap, I forgot, I was counting ... 1, 2 ...", and so on. It's not always that bad, but if you've ever meditated, you know how it goes some times.
A short OBE, and OBE, lucid dreams, and Zen thoughts
On Friday I drove to a lodge about ninety miles north of my current apartment. I got there too early to check in, so I did what I planned to do: Changed my clothes, pulled my bicycle out of the back of the car, and road a 25-mile bike path.
When I got back from the ride I checked into the lodge, took a shower, and walked around for a while. Tired from a lack of sleep the last two nights, I had dinner, came back to the lodge, read a book for a while, then began to fall asleep.
Zen, Makyo, and The Matrix
I've probably written about makyo before, but after reading part of The Three Pillars of Zen by Roshi Philip Kapleau last night, I thought I'd share some quotes from that book this morning.
The first quote describes makyo:
"Makyo are the phenomena -- visions, hallucinations, fantasies, revelations, illusory sensations -- which one practicing zazen is apt to experience at a particular stage in his sitting."
And then:
"the number of makyo which can appear are in fact unlimited ..."
